I once went hiking with a group of young people in the Alps. It was an adventurous trip over a large glacier with an overnight stay at a 3300-meter-high cabin from where we could watch sunset and sunrise. As we approached the glacier, a thick fog started to come in preventing us from seeing anything. Some of the youngsters began to cry, so I decided we should go back. After saying a prayer, we started to turn around but out of the thick mist came an old man saying to us “Don’t fear, I will be your guide!” Indeed, skillfully he led us over the glacier and its crevices with great knowledge and care to our destined cabin. All of us were calm and no one was fearful!
This incident came to mind as I reflected on the situation last month when my sister and her husband were in intensive care (my sister is still in danger). In those moments we needed someone to guide and comfort us. Scripture comes to our aid: “Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path” Psalm 119:105. What is it saying? Who is he? “The Lord is my shepherd, there is nothing I shall want… Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me” Psalm 23.
In whatever difficulties we find ourselves, we need to know that Jesus is with us, not to condemn us, but to save us. Almost automatically we presume the opposite. For instance, when a leper said to Jesus “If you want to, you can make me clean”, it sounds like the leper thinks Jesus does not want him healed. But Jesus says “Of course I want to; be clean” and immediately the leprosy left him. (Mark 1:40f). The most important attitude we need to have at those times is to have faith that God wants whatever is best for us – whether healing by miracles or being taken up into God’s embrace of love for eternal happiness.
When we are faced with sickness and death there is a natural desire in us to fight for survival. When I told my godmother, who was then almost ninety, after her closest relatives and friends had passed away, that she probably was looking forward to die, she said “After you, sir!” Although this is our normal reaction to the afterlife, our faith should help us to have a healthy attitude towards death, without fear. Thus, meditation on death and praying for a holy death should be cultivated during our life.
When we are in situations where a dear one is seriously ill and in danger of death, we obviously desire them to be healed and not to die. No one wants to lose a dear one. At those moments we find it difficult to pray. How should we pray? Should we pray for healing, or simply pray that God’s will be done? May we pray for a miracle, or should we resign ourselves to what seems inevitable? After all, “heaven” is a better place.
There is a story in 2 Samuel 12:16-23 about David praying and fasting for his son that he bore by Bathsheba. When the child died, David’s servants were afraid to tell him fearing that he would harm himself. But when he found out that the child had died, he washed his face, anointed himself and worshipped the Lord. His servants did not understand this behaviour and asked him. He responded, “While the child was still alive, I fasted and wept; for I said, ‘Who knows whether the Lord will be gracious to me, that the child may live?’
David, who gave us the psalms, here also shows us how to pray in times of distress. He prays with all his might as long as the child is alive. He tells God what is in his heart and what he wants for the child. But once God has taken his son, he resigns himself to God’s will. He prays therefore as Jesus prayed in the Garden of Gethsemane “he fell on his face and prayed, “My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as you will.” Matthew 26:39
In summary: “Have no anxiety about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which passes all understanding, will keep your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:6-7)